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hmm...although your problem seems to be a little more complex than mine was, i wonder if it would work.
basically i was having the same problem, where my network of 3 computers could all share teh internet, but was having trouble seeing each others computers in network places and such.
what i did was to set up a network under windows xp and instead of putting "this computer connects through the internet from another computer, etc" i checked the "this computer is not connected to teh internet". i was then able to see the other computers, and we were able to share files.
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